I keep this pillow on my family room couch as a reminder, not just for me but my entire family, that there are consequences and behaviors that form and are attached to everything that we do. Even those little things that we think are so small and minor. As a people, we mindlessly say and do things repeatedly not realizing that there are behaviors that form and come along with those repeated actions. Well, I desire for my children to know now that there is. I am aiming to start now helping them to create healthy behaviors. So that they are not like their mommy. In their 30's trying to break bad behaviors and cycles. These little reminders seem small to some, but they are really and truly HUGE in the long run! Start now with your little ones. Their future will thank you for it. #Unapologetically #UnapologeticAF
AND WON'T! Let's talk!
Often times we go above and beyond to try to prove ourselves, who we are and what we stand for to an audience of folk who could care less. For instance the Ken's and Karen's of this world. These..... beings are beyond stuck in their ways. There is nothing that any one of us could do to change their thought process. They just are who they are and believe what they want to believe. But some of us try incessantly to do so. No matter how many back flips, front flips and limbs you try to give, there will always be folk in this world who will think of you the way that they want to think of you. So please stop trying because them other folk will watch you do all of that, then you die early and they still will spit on your grave. Bend over backwards for you. Overextend yourself for you because you will always have you. #Periodt and #Unapologetically #UnapologeticAF
This may be minor to some, but it's major to me. Note to Self: Don't let people dishonor or mistreat you because you choose to honor and treat yourself. Let's talk.
For the longest, I thought that if I constantly put others before myself that it would be honorable and showing humbleness. If I had an accomplishment I would keep it to myself because my fear of making someone else feel less than, if even for a moment to celebrate myself, shook me to my core. So I would stay in my corner with all my accomplishments and accolades just because I never wanted to make anyone feel like I was trying to "outshine" them because I wasn't. But what did it do? Nothing but kill my confidence in myself slowly but surely. Something as minor as even having a personalized license plate or a non traditional colored vehicle shook me because these things make you stand out. But I've worked hard to get where I am and so have you reading this. Stop allowing folks who shine on themselves all day and night for stuff that they are supposed to do make you feel that if you took a moment to celebrate, treat or honor yourself, that you are not being honorable or humble. The way you treat yourself should set the tone for how others treat you. So honor you. Treat you. Love on you and if someone has a problem with that, that's between them and Jesus. #Unapologetically #UnapologeticAF
I need for you, yes you reading this post, to worry about protecting your peace more than protecting your name.
Note to Self: Don't be misery's company. Let's talk.
People will spit, stomp and run over your name just because the sky is gray and not blue that day. But you know who you are and those who know you know you (yes I said it twice) know who you are. Your peace is much more important than defending yourself against someone who is having a bad day, week, month, or year. Put your peace above all else and leave the rest between them and Jesus. #Unapologetically #UnapologeticAF
Ever have one of those days where you just don't have much of anything to give? You give so much day in and day out and just want one day where it's just for you. Welp, TUDAY is that day for me. Today, I just don't have it and that's okay. A hard lesson that I had to learn because I was draining myself trying to show up EVERY single day! Know that it's okay to have a day where you focus on you and your mental wellbeing. Don't push yourself into an early grave trying to please the world because the world is not worried about pleasing you boo boo kitty. Do what you can and leave the rest between them and Jesus! #Unapologetically #UnapologeticAF
SN. T-SHIRT courtesy of one of my little's on my 40th birthday cause THEY KNOW! Tuh!
I was always one of those people who thought highly of what others thought of me. I would bend how I acted and carried myself so that others would be pleased and not offended by any means. Did it always work? No, and it was EXTREMELY draining. Mentally, physically, emotionally and even spiritually. Then I begin to notice that my daughter was being more aware of my mannerisms and mimicking the way that I was carrying myself. When I thought about it, I realized that I didn't want my daughter to pick up on those habits that I was doing that didn't please nor serve my highest good.
I didn't want to pass on to her this mentality that you have to bend yourself to please others. So I had to make some changes before those unfavorable behaviors that she was mimicking stuck. I want my daughter to learn to love herself unconditionally. So I had to learn to love myself unconditionally. I desire for my daughter to not have to fight the same battles that I have fought for all of my life. So I have to stop making those battles an option on my life. What I want her to know is that if you are happy with you, that is all that matters because people change with the wind. The last 40 years have taught me that tough lesson. It was and is up to me and if I can help it, she won't have to. #Unapologetically and #UnapologeticAF
When I was Pastoring (in the deep Bible belt South) folk always had something to say about how I should act, dress and be as a Pastors wife. My husband would sit in pulpits while I would sit in the pews because I was a woman (even though I was an ordained Pastor like my husband). Because I have tattoos and piercings and prefer tennis shoes over heels, that just made everything even worse. When I went to the military instead of college and got pregnant (being unmarried), I was told that I was smarter than that to have gotten myself in that situation. I could go on for days with those stories of what I did vs what I was told I should and should not have done with my life. The truth of the matter is that people will always have an idea about who and what you should be based on how they see you. What you deserve and when you should have it. How and where you should carry yourself, etc. But what matters is how you see yourself. The only box that you should be put in is the one that you put yourself in. This way you decide how tall, how wide and how fancy the box will be. Stop allowing folk to tell you what you do and don't deserve. Who you are and who you are not. No one has that right to box you in. So when people attempt to create a box for you, let them know "No thank you. I got this." #Unapologetically #UnapologeticAF